BANGALORE: I was home…but only for a bit

My bags were packed and so I left Madras with a heavy heart. I was completely unsure about everything. In my first month I tried to adjust to my “new” life in Bangalore. Being with my parents was great. I had missed them so much. I left home when I was a preteen and came home as an adult. They missed my teenage years. I cannot imagine what they must have gone through. They too had to adjust to me now and I knew it was not going to be easy for either of us.

The surroundings were familiar, some friends were still there, but it wasn’t the same as it was when we were kids. Everyone seemed to have grown up too…..duh! Why did I think that people would be the same? But some things remained unchanged. The narrow mindedness of the community remained the same and having a direct personality did not help me re-assimilate. They couldn’t understand why I couldn’t be more girlish (whatever that meant). So I kept away from the community, which seemed to work for all parties involved.

Mom helped me with my admission into school and we finally settled on an all girls college. Now there is something you should know about me. Most of my friends while growing up were guys, and I was never one of the “girly-girls” I was always one of the guys. So for me, this was going to be an interesting experience. Since I had moved back, I was not interested in anything, and was becoming anti-social which was new for me. I couldn’t understand what was going on with me. Thus started my “rebellious” phase.

Life at home had its moments and, just like most families, we got along most days. We also had our share of “not so nice days”. I had several outbursts at home, causing my mom and me to constantly butt heads. My outbursts stemmed from not being able to study what I wanted, not being able to be with my friends, and then finding out that he may have found someone else. Mom had this notion that I blamed her for sending me to Madras. I never did and I couldn’t convince her otherwise. She and dad had their reasons and I didn’t want to know why. I was exactly like my mother, and yet different. She was more emotional than me, and I was more aggressive than her, but she was my everything. She was more forgiving of people, I was not. One of my character flaws(which I am still working on)-I don’t usually give second chances to anyone-family or friends.

Why did it seem like life was about to get more complicated? Maybe I was wrong….bring on college life.